Well, one school, because of one possible swine flu case, in our district closed Monday. NOT the school I'm at. No one seems to know what's what or panicking, except, it seems, the news. There's always a lot of kids sick in schools.
Got my Possets oil scent samples in the mail today. I am a serious scent addict. It calms me.
Jumbled lines in my head. I am still not disciplined enough to WRITE A LINE OR IDEA DOWN as soon as I get it.
No one is reading this...HEY YOU OUT THERE...if you read this, leave a comment!
G'night.
Monday, May 4, 2009
Saturday, May 2, 2009
May Day
Oh!
(after a week of lousy blood sugar, hellish finances, mystery flu and some sad,disturbing moments with-hate the phrase,but here it is,covers everyone in my life-significant others)
it was Friday! And May Day!
And I had a sudden flash memory: Of making paper cones, filling them with flowers and giving them to parents, friends, neighbors. At least once in my life, I have danced around a maypole and the best memory of all, so dreamlike that I've checked with childhood friends: Did this really happen? Yes, yes it did and it was as enchanting as I recall: waking up some spring morning and finding our lawns covered with wildflowers: tiny snowdrops, dutchman's breeches hiding close to the trees , bluebells. Cherry,apple,pear trees blooming, and a fairy ring (a perfect circle of much darker grass on the lawn,where the fairies had danced.)
A gift, this memory. All these years, it must have been hiding behind bills, arguments, joys, reports, faces and voices.
Waking up, Persephone, warming, sweet rain, hope. Hey! This memory was closer than i thought-I know I wrote a poem about emerging in the spring...
wonder what notebook it's in...
(after a week of lousy blood sugar, hellish finances, mystery flu and some sad,disturbing moments with-hate the phrase,but here it is,covers everyone in my life-significant others)
it was Friday! And May Day!
And I had a sudden flash memory: Of making paper cones, filling them with flowers and giving them to parents, friends, neighbors. At least once in my life, I have danced around a maypole and the best memory of all, so dreamlike that I've checked with childhood friends: Did this really happen? Yes, yes it did and it was as enchanting as I recall: waking up some spring morning and finding our lawns covered with wildflowers: tiny snowdrops, dutchman's breeches hiding close to the trees , bluebells. Cherry,apple,pear trees blooming, and a fairy ring (a perfect circle of much darker grass on the lawn,where the fairies had danced.)
A gift, this memory. All these years, it must have been hiding behind bills, arguments, joys, reports, faces and voices.
Waking up, Persephone, warming, sweet rain, hope. Hey! This memory was closer than i thought-I know I wrote a poem about emerging in the spring...
wonder what notebook it's in...
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Prime the pump...
Writing, about anything seems to- as every teacher I ever had told me-that writing begats writing begats the wonderful feeling, that need to, want to create.
OR, it could just be my Piscean way of hiding from..you know...life.
OR, it could just be my Piscean way of hiding from..you know...life.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
Books books books books
Lately, have been reading:
Seven Days In The Art World/Sarah Thornton (library)
The Poet's Notebook/ edited:Kuusisto, Tall, Weiss (library)
A Book of Luminous Things/edited: Czeslaw Milosz (my own; a favorite)
All of This and Nothing/ Christoper Major (this and other of his work free downloads-gotta find links!)
Oh!And Mother Goose, just for fun;illustrations by Blanche Fisher Wright.
Now, (well not now,I'm tired) I want to swoon over Parrish's and Dulac's illustrations)
Past couple years, have been reading almost exclusively (besides poetry), non-fiction: Malcolm Gladwell, Joan Didion, Annie Dillard, Mirth of a Nation, My Mother's Wedding Dress, Perfumes: The Guide, the governments 9/11 report. 2 1/2 times, that one. Finally, Br, P and R asked me to please stop reading it. It was a racous read, what with my frequent shrieks, sputterings, throwing the book across the room and demanding "LISTEN TO THIS!!!!!!!!!!"...followed by semi-coherent rants.
Oh, there's more...Im tired...
Sleep sweet, sweet sleep
Seven Days In The Art World/Sarah Thornton (library)
The Poet's Notebook/ edited:Kuusisto, Tall, Weiss (library)
A Book of Luminous Things/edited: Czeslaw Milosz (my own; a favorite)
All of This and Nothing/ Christoper Major (this and other of his work free downloads-gotta find links!)
Oh!And Mother Goose, just for fun;illustrations by Blanche Fisher Wright.
Now, (well not now,I'm tired) I want to swoon over Parrish's and Dulac's illustrations)
Past couple years, have been reading almost exclusively (besides poetry), non-fiction: Malcolm Gladwell, Joan Didion, Annie Dillard, Mirth of a Nation, My Mother's Wedding Dress, Perfumes: The Guide, the governments 9/11 report. 2 1/2 times, that one. Finally, Br, P and R asked me to please stop reading it. It was a racous read, what with my frequent shrieks, sputterings, throwing the book across the room and demanding "LISTEN TO THIS!!!!!!!!!!"...followed by semi-coherent rants.
Oh, there's more...Im tired...
Sleep sweet, sweet sleep
Monday, April 27, 2009
oh dear
A jangled weekend. Br,P,R and I each upset about various things and I was no help to them at all.
Br made FOUR peanut-butter cheesecakes. We each ate about a 1/2 of one-not all at once A treat now and then is legal, but I forgot to take insulin Sunday and maybe Saturday night.
Brandon remarked I was acting 'drunk' ( I don't drink). I felt too happy, then too sad and did not make the connection til Monday morning when I awoke disoriented, groggy, not 'right'. Blood sugar was below 80. I feel best when it's between 100-115. I felt like I was going to fall asleep driving from Aurora to Oak Lawn.
Should have gone home, but I went to school, where luckily the diabetes experts took over, God bless them: they are either diabetic or live with someone who is. The nurse followed me home. I had some juice and fell asleep. I'm not hungry. But I do feel better. This was a scary occurrence. I have never forgotten meds before and I've been pretty good at catching the blood sugar drops as soon as it drops. And this cannot happen again.
The magnolia is in full bloom, with petals already on the lawn. Thunderstorms. A dreamy spring.
What am I most worried about lately? Oh, yeah---the mortgage.
Br made FOUR peanut-butter cheesecakes. We each ate about a 1/2 of one-not all at once A treat now and then is legal, but I forgot to take insulin Sunday and maybe Saturday night.
Brandon remarked I was acting 'drunk' ( I don't drink). I felt too happy, then too sad and did not make the connection til Monday morning when I awoke disoriented, groggy, not 'right'. Blood sugar was below 80. I feel best when it's between 100-115. I felt like I was going to fall asleep driving from Aurora to Oak Lawn.
Should have gone home, but I went to school, where luckily the diabetes experts took over, God bless them: they are either diabetic or live with someone who is. The nurse followed me home. I had some juice and fell asleep. I'm not hungry. But I do feel better. This was a scary occurrence. I have never forgotten meds before and I've been pretty good at catching the blood sugar drops as soon as it drops. And this cannot happen again.
The magnolia is in full bloom, with petals already on the lawn. Thunderstorms. A dreamy spring.
What am I most worried about lately? Oh, yeah---the mortgage.
Sunday, April 26, 2009
I do not heart blogging.
Well, I don't .
This is about blog #5 for me and just like the diaries I tried to keep as a kid, I could not maintain them.
The problem seems to be: what do I want it to be about?
I'm not comfortable with it being a diary-too personal.
The poems are written by hand in various notebooks and don't get on the computer until I'm fairly sure they're done.
My opinions? Op-ed? Essays? Same as with the poetry and who cares what a midwestern, divorced, baby boomer, mother of 2 adult children, sp ed teacher thinks about anything anyway?
Geeeeze...sometimes I can't stand the sound of my own voice and sometimes I can't stand the visual of my own writing...blah blah blah...
So this will be an evolving, experimental blog. Or something like that.
This is about blog #5 for me and just like the diaries I tried to keep as a kid, I could not maintain them.
The problem seems to be: what do I want it to be about?
I'm not comfortable with it being a diary-too personal.
The poems are written by hand in various notebooks and don't get on the computer until I'm fairly sure they're done.
My opinions? Op-ed? Essays? Same as with the poetry and who cares what a midwestern, divorced, baby boomer, mother of 2 adult children, sp ed teacher thinks about anything anyway?
Geeeeze...sometimes I can't stand the sound of my own voice and sometimes I can't stand the visual of my own writing...blah blah blah...
So this will be an evolving, experimental blog. Or something like that.
Saturday, April 25, 2009
The Magnolias Are A'bloom
(pictures in reverse from bottom up) For awhile,there's a lovely pink and green bower framing my house. And WHOOOOO! I'm going green. That means a lawn of clover, violets and dandelions and not to save the earth, but because I hate yardwork. I hate spreading lawn feed and trimming bushes and trees. The ex left me gardens on all sides of the house and garage and I detest weeding. I'll rip out whatever can be ripped out then spread cheap mulch.
Blogging...just seems like another diary I start, then stop, like when I was a kid. I'll try. It does seem to prime the pump and keep me writing.
But I will NOT twitter.
Patty's BFA show and other stuff
Patty's work was beautifully displayed (April)in SAIC's Sullivan Gallery. She was so lovely. Her friends, teachers from previous school, family were there for her. All around, a great night.
Now graduation in May. Then....????
(Thank you, Poetry Victims)
Friday, March 13, 2009
oh my oh my
Patty's birthday was Weds, 3/11. Rog and I bought a cake and saw her and Jason's apt in Chinatown. It's in an old building, lots of sweet details, very good vibe from the building and the apt. The apt is decorated like...an art student's apt!
She showed us the projects she's putting in the BFA show on 3/20, at SAIC. I cry when I think of it, the show...silly, huh?
Have been sick sick sick all week...need more antibiotics and busy at work and depressed at home with piles of bills...
Have not checked email all week---just go home and sleep.
And---vanity----what to wear to the show without looking like a suburban mom?
Have three partial poems in my head and 3 partial poems on paper but can't bring it all together. I'm just jotting down lines, feels like being lost...i'll pay some bills, get some rest, focus on Patty's show, then sort my thoughts and regroup. Blood sugar highish, not eating well. And Brandon is my rock.
She showed us the projects she's putting in the BFA show on 3/20, at SAIC. I cry when I think of it, the show...silly, huh?
Have been sick sick sick all week...need more antibiotics and busy at work and depressed at home with piles of bills...
Have not checked email all week---just go home and sleep.
And---vanity----what to wear to the show without looking like a suburban mom?
Have three partial poems in my head and 3 partial poems on paper but can't bring it all together. I'm just jotting down lines, feels like being lost...i'll pay some bills, get some rest, focus on Patty's show, then sort my thoughts and regroup. Blood sugar highish, not eating well. And Brandon is my rock.
Sunday, March 1, 2009
The Name My Mother Almost Named Me
Tomorrow is my birthday.
It seems like a good time to haul out an old story that has passed into family lore. I didn't find out about it until my late 20's, when we were tossing names about for our first soon to be born child.
My mother wanted my first and middle names to honor female relatives.
Mer mother's (my grandmother) name was Survylla Alice but she was called Sally. My grandmother's sister was named Rilla. My mother's step-father's mother's name was Cynthia. My paternal grandmother's name was Ella. So my mom had some odd names and syllables to work with.
After much thought-so she said-she decided that the perfect name for me would be Cinda Rilla.
My mother was laughing when she told this to me. My father and my eventually ex-husband joined in. This was major laugh-so-hard-you-cry, hold-the-stitch-in-your-side major yuks yuks for them. I see the humor now. I was truly horrified that my otherwise sensible mother would have even considered Cinda Rilla.
But a nurse suggested she think about it a bit more and Cynthia Alice was chosen.
God bless you, O, anonymous angel of mercy.
And Happy Birthday to Jon BonJovi, Lou Reed,Dr. Seuss,Kurt Weill,Desi Arnaz, John Irving,Tom Wolfe, Bedrich Friedrich Smetana (composer: the exquisite Moldau).
Fine company and Pisceans all!
It seems like a good time to haul out an old story that has passed into family lore. I didn't find out about it until my late 20's, when we were tossing names about for our first soon to be born child.
My mother wanted my first and middle names to honor female relatives.
Mer mother's (my grandmother) name was Survylla Alice but she was called Sally. My grandmother's sister was named Rilla. My mother's step-father's mother's name was Cynthia. My paternal grandmother's name was Ella. So my mom had some odd names and syllables to work with.
After much thought-so she said-she decided that the perfect name for me would be Cinda Rilla.
My mother was laughing when she told this to me. My father and my eventually ex-husband joined in. This was major laugh-so-hard-you-cry, hold-the-stitch-in-your-side major yuks yuks for them. I see the humor now. I was truly horrified that my otherwise sensible mother would have even considered Cinda Rilla.
But a nurse suggested she think about it a bit more and Cynthia Alice was chosen.
God bless you, O, anonymous angel of mercy.
And Happy Birthday to Jon BonJovi, Lou Reed,Dr. Seuss,Kurt Weill,Desi Arnaz, John Irving,Tom Wolfe, Bedrich Friedrich Smetana (composer: the exquisite Moldau).
Fine company and Pisceans all!
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