May Day

Oh!
(after a week of lousy blood sugar, hellish finances, mystery flu and some sad,disturbing moments with-hate the phrase,but here it is,covers everyone in my life-significant others)
it was Friday! And May Day!
And I had a sudden flash memory: Of making paper cones, filling them with flowers and giving them to parents, friends, neighbors. At least once in my life, I have danced around a maypole and the best memory of all, so dreamlike that I've checked with childhood friends: Did this really happen? Yes, yes it did and it was as enchanting as I recall: waking up some spring morning and finding our lawns covered with wildflowers: tiny snowdrops, dutchman's breeches hiding close to the trees , bluebells. Cherry,apple,pear trees blooming, and a fairy ring (a perfect circle of much darker grass on the lawn,where the fairies had danced.)
A gift, this memory. All these years, it must have been hiding behind bills, arguments, joys, reports, faces and voices.
Waking up, Persephone, warming, sweet rain, hope. Hey! This memory was closer than i thought-I know I wrote a poem about emerging in the spring...
wonder what notebook it's in...

oh dear

A jangled weekend. Br,P,R and I each upset about various things and I was no help to them at all.
Br made FOUR peanut-butter cheesecakes. We each ate about a 1/2 of one-not all at once A treat now and then is legal, but I forgot to take insulin Sunday and maybe Saturday night.
Brandon remarked I was acting 'drunk' ( I don't drink). I felt too happy, then too sad and did not make the connection til Monday morning when I awoke disoriented, groggy, not 'right'. Blood sugar was below 80. I feel best when it's between 100-115. I felt like I was going to fall asleep driving from Aurora to Oak Lawn.
Should have gone home, but I went to school, where luckily the diabetes experts took over, God bless them: they are either diabetic or live with someone who is. The nurse followed me home. I had some juice and fell asleep. I'm not hungry. But I do feel better. This was a scary occurrence. I have never forgotten meds before and I've been pretty good at catching the blood sugar drops as soon as it drops. And this cannot happen again.

The magnolia is in full bloom, with petals already on the lawn. Thunderstorms. A dreamy spring.
What am I most worried about lately? Oh, yeah---the mortgage.